So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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