I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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