Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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