so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize