Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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