Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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