is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize