Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize