You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
