Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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