Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
