Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
