What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize