I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize