Nicole vs. Life
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
