wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
