I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
