I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
