Christians are straight up FREAKS
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
