He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
