using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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