he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
our cab driver is having phone sex.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize