Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
