she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
