I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
