woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
