My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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