so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
