No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
