school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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