ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
