Whod you bang
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
please come you make the beer taste better
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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