p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
