Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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