How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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