I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
