i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize