i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
You are a genius and a whore.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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