the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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