I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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