Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize