Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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