when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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