i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
