Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize