This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Randomize
