we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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