found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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