Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
