I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize