Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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