so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
