I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
